2013 reflection - we can always grow

2013's story: there is always growing to do. 

This year I have grown as a mom who has it a little more together this year than last. I know a year ago I could handle my kids.... Notice I said handle, not enjoy. Now I can enjoy them. Yes, I still have a ways to go (and part of it is getting the time to get there) but it's a step.

As a couple, we learned a lot about our limits. You'd think after 10 years we would have it down, but life is always changing. The last few years with kids, lack of sleep, and work has been hard on our relationship. But we have love, so we work on us when we can. It isn't always a smooth road but as long as we learn we move forward with a bit more grace. I challenge anyone who is going through a rough spot to read the five languages of love, to take the effort to make dates that have talks of money, house, and kids off limits, to name 5 things you like about them a day - instead of what drives you nuts. People are not perfect but you marry them for a reason you know :) 

The kids grew leaps and bounds! Addison is talking a mile a minute, can go up and down stairs , and loves to play with her babies. Jacob has learned that he can figure out a lot of problems - like how to get around a gate to climb stairs. He has a bit of a road to go yet to find his voice but we know he will get there. Madalyn has learned ballet - loves it. She has learned to do math like a genius and remembers so many things that it amazes me daily. She is such an angel. 

As a working woman I learned that I am smarter than I think most days, that I still have a lot to learn. I'm always making mistakes and learning from them and getting new perspectives that I may not have thought about without my coworkers. When you think about it, you spend a lot of time at work so hopefully you learn something along the way.

As a woman in general I think I grew the least. I wanted to try running but had no time, I wanted to lose weight and didn't, I wanted to be more healthy and wasn't really. But I did learn that I can do it and I want to now lol - so baby steps.

So hopefully you all learned something this year and if you don't feel like you have - make it a goal. Grow grow grow!

Count your blessings

My wish for all of your this holiday season is that you can all count your blessings as I can. That every time life gets a bit crazy, a bit overwhelming, that you can stop and count. If you give yourself that gift you can smile more as you go through those tough moments.

 

As I drove home tonight with three kids in the back seat and a really long day behind us (as it always is) I felt really thankful for my three crazy kids. Yes as you can imagine, it gets really nuts around here. I swear we are the only ones walking into daycare with one crying, one wanting held, and one running wild as we go. I hear the following often: 'wow you have your hands full', 'your house must be crazy', 'I don't know how you do it'....and the likewise comments can go on. But really, I love it, I do. I've always been a little crazy so maybe that is why - but I love most all of it. yes I do have my crazy 'bad mom' moments where it's overwhelming, yes I wish Jacob would stop torturing the girls, that Addison would give Jacob a chance, and that Madalyn would stop dragging Addison around like she is a doll. But all in all we are really lucky - and they are lucky to get to grow together, experience together, get mad together. While Jacob may torture his sisters - he will give his precious binky up without hesitation if Addison is crying. Madalyn loves to put them to sleep and act like mom. Addison is my loner - happy to have two minutes of peace away from the other two but is always up for pretending with Madalyn.

I can see it all now - Madalyn my dancer who is too good will grow up to be the popular girl in school who I have to convince constantly that she can make mistakes. Addison - oh year she's going to give me trouble - I see tattoos and piercings and some dark makeup in her future, but hey we could all use a little bit of Goth around. Maybe she will get into gymnastics - with how tiny she is and how much we hang her upside down, it would be fun. Jacob - now the debate is what he will be. Jonathan wants a sporty kid, typical guy. But he has a very awesome mechanical nack and can figure out problems in such a great way - I think he'll be my little programmer. Hey, a girl can dream :). They will hopefully be healthy and not into drugs and that's the only thing I want really for them. The rest they will figure out and surprise me.

I count my blessings often, it's why I'm so glad I have them. It's not a hard thing to do, I almost lost 2 out of 3 of them so it's hard not to love every laugh, smile, and crazy thing they do.
1. Technology for babies - it's why I march for babies for the March of Dimes - can you imagine if we had no clue that Addison had a condition that would kill her in-utero?  We would not have kept on top of it and known when it was time to get them out of me.
2. Addison hearing my prayers - 31 weeks was the magic number that would give Jacob the best chance and Addison a chance as well for both to live. 31 weeks, that is 8 weeks early and still really risky - but the alternative was not a good one. so we threw out pregnancy books and focused on the goal....31 weeks. Addison did it, she is my hero - she kept slowly growing and had no big changes until - 31 weeks!! they were born at 32 weeks, 1 day. blessing counted.
3. Nurses in the NICU - Jacob fought to breathe for what felt like 100 days, in reality it was closer to 4 days. Until his lung finally collapsed and he got a chest tube in to help. The nurses kept him comfortable, kept me back, and watched him like a hawk. I swear the one was his own angel - he kept calmest for her.
4. Healthy kids - all three could have had all kinds of health issues. I see tons from the nicu kids, and random things for a bunch of little ones. my kids are active and healthy. some times it would be nice if they sat still but why wish that on them - maybe they would not be able to move at all? who would want that...
5. Happy kids - I hate when they frown, Madalyn can be really hard of herself - I have to remind her often that it's ok to make mistakes, break things, say the wrong thing, fall. I know it's not realistic but if I could stop every sad moment from them I would. Instead, I'll be thankful they have no reason to be sad now.

The list could go on, but those are my top ones - the ones I remind myself of when everyone is screaming and others around have no idea what to do. Someone up there knew exactly what they were doing when they gave me the three of them - a mom who can remember what it was like to be a kid, who does not expect the best all the time, who has made the fun mistakes in life, who can ignore three screaming kids while she eats a piece of pie. So while it may look hard (and it can be), you can also be secretly jealous of how much I love it. sadistic I know...

Merry Christmas all.

Aren't kids a work out?

I mean, when you think about it, I lift two 20+ lb weights and a 30 lb weight all the time, sometimes two at once! I watch other people hold my kids and 'uuugghhh...they are heavy!'. To me it's not so bad, I do it all the time - as they both want in my arms at the same time. So why am I not losing more weight?

Well if I think about it I could be gaining muscle? I guess I eat more than I did, since I can't get away with Lipton rice or Mac and cheese for my whole meal. It doesn't help that my husband loads my plate with twice as much as I'd eat! 

So the plan? Eat less, exercise, stop my peanut m&m fetish when working late at night.

what about you, what's your plan? 

MMMM Cakes, Cookies, Candy

Ha ha made you look. I actually am not a fan of these things so walking away from them is easy. I do watch other people eat them like its awesome to have the biggest slice or a pack of cookies! Don't get me wrong,  I eat cookies and ill eat cake ...and a rare tasty cake - I just have no desire to go overboard! Take Oreos - I trained myself in college to eat only the recommended 3! 

Reading the fat deterred me otherwise and I learned to enjoy the taste...plus I was a poor college student, I had to skimp. I'm a firm believer in moderation. Sure, I have my downfall foods... But the key is not everything I eat is my downfall .

So my simple mom trick - read the packages - read the fat - and read the serving size - then try it. I can go through a party size bag of m&ms myself - I eat a handful a night as a 'kudos to you awesome mom you made it through another day'. If hubby dives into the bag he doesn't know moderation and my bag goes bye bye! Baby steps ladies - pick a food you like (not love) and eat in moderation.

Skin and the little sensitive girl

My oldest daughter has sensitive skin and it seems the twins may be following in her footsteps. The winter makes it dryer so I am already starting to see itchy kids and random rashes.
Several months back, we had a battle. Maddie's groin area was constantly red and it looked awful! Every time I went to the doc I got a different answer: rash from food, yeast, too much juice - you name it, we heard it and tried it! Nothing was helping, I was ready to cry along with her - I mean as a women - wow - it looked painful and all I could do was try to help!
Finally one night she itched it open and I freaked (blood and all down there ... Millions of bad thoughts ran through my head until I realized it was from scratches) - thankfully my own personal super nurse hubby assisted while I freaked, lol. The next day we headed back to the docs - and YAY - the best doc was finally off maternity leave. She diagnosed it in 10 min - we had the rash disappear in a week and we haven't had an issue since (except minor flare ups)! What was it, you ask? Eczema - simple hydrocortisone cream for a day and eczema cream when it looks like she's getting a flare up.

Eczema cream trials:

The doc recommended eucerin cream.

It wasn't bad, but was kinda runny and had a slight scent.

Then I found aveeno Eczema cream

I love aveeno products - it is all I use for washing on my kids. This product rocks for her - it's a thicker base, and no sent to bother her. 

I've also tried some of my own recipes for lotion for her - stay tuned on my trials!

Mornings are tough for me...working out...blahh

Ok so 'they' say nighttime is not good to workout but seriously I'm far from a morning person! I try and try and it will last a few day of 10 minute, then 7, and down to 5 mins on the elliptical. I'm determined to find a way to exercise and enjoy it or at least feel good after. I grew up swimming and dancing my weight off, neither works into my life now with kids. I even went as far as to look into a swim spa - love it, want it, but more than I can spend right now on something I just want. 

I hate running but I feel like its my only option. So I found something fun about it - the color run - where I can be a kid and get covered in powder paint! Ok so I gotta run three miles to so it. 

http://thecolorrun.com

Sounds like an easy plan right? Not in my life - in my life how will I leave three kids to run and train? I tried to work with my husband and his schedule to accomplish it - that didn't work. So I did the next best thing - found a used treadmill and made a spot in the house. I can't say I get in it enough - and I never made it to the color run this year - but I have goals - I swear by the run next year I will be ready for three miles!

 

My Life

So a little about me so you get an understanding when I say my life is crazy. I have twins who are 2 and a 4 year old singleton. 

The twins were 2 months early so I'm sure you'll see posts devoted to my respect for the NICU. Their nicknames are banshee and monster... and they earned them! My 4 year old is an awesome, way too easy, special princess - who steals the hearts of a lot of people with her love! I have a husband who works nights as a nurse manager. I work days as a IT manager in a high paced stressful line of work....just our jobs alone give us enough crazy, uber busy, moments.

My best friends are out of town and I don't have the time for a social life. Our parents are not the stop by every day kind but they do help out when they can... My husband dreams of the parents who stop by all the time and take the kids for weekends...lol, poor guy :) I can't find a sitter for very long that I can trust with the three of them....so we rarely get out. 

My typical day goes like this:
getting up usually to a crying kid
getting ready in 10 minutes
3 kids out of bed, providing sippy cups,
I dress, feed and get them out the door
Hubby meets me at daycare to say hi as he is coming home from work.
I head to my many meetings and such at work
I get out to help pick up the kids... Or at least make it to help get dinner
Dinner(thankfully hubby cooks!!)
play, bath, bed for the kids
help hubby out the door
clean or work
finally sleep around 11. 

Sound exhausting? It is. But hey, I'm now used to it and starting to feel like me again! But then I look in that darn mirror!   I don't look like the me I knew before kids - and yea I'm older but I'd like to look in the mirror and say 'yep I look good!' - not 'Man do I look frumpy!'

So what will I write about? Kids stuff, sensitive skin trials, exercise trials, Nicu things, making some things like Chapstick, and anything else that may amuse you all.

Welcome

Most days I feel like just a mom...I look in the mirror and I look and feel tired, my hair is a mess, my skin is a mess and then I look away from the mirror to take care of the kids. I work full time, as does my hubby - we work opposite shifts so most days it is a bit crazy in our household with 3 kids under 6. No - I do not have the time to be a health nut. No - I do not have the time go all natural but I do find some things important that I put in and on our bodies. I like to find things that are kid friendly and good for my super sensitive self and little ones. Yes, I will talk about my kids a lot! Yes everything listed won't take very long to do so whether making new things or exercising it'll probably be under 20 minutes to do.
My goal is to find a way for us crazy busy moms to still feel like we have it - that spunk that made us thrive. To feel like we are are healthy and beautiful even when there is puke all over us and everyone is screaming. I don't know if I'm going to achieve it but I'm gonna try like hell when I have a little time. Support is always good during a journey come on along maybe we'll get through this phase :)